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Tuesday, April 14, 2009

Physical or Spiritual or both?

Well I thought I would write a bit tonight. I am still definitly wanting to try and loose 90 in 09 but it is not lookin so good for it! Loosing weight has ALWAYS been an issue for me for whatever good reason or bad reason. Different docs have said different things. Anyway, We have had some things goin on this past week that were very difficult to deal with but definitly needed in our walk with God! We felt God leading us to step down from being children's Pastors and to go to another undetermined as of yet Church. We have been praying over this decision for a couple weeks and Bobby of course made the final decision and also decided when and everything this would happen. I have some emotional ties to a couple of ladies at our former Church not to mention some really great friends in them as well as the rest of the congregation. It was a very rough thing for me to think about leaving all these folks, esepecially at such a time as we are beginning the Journey to Jeremiah and his adoption and all. BUT, God is who we depend on and who we trust so we were very prayerful and making sure what we all heard God saying. We so wanted to make sure we were in HIS will for our lives. It was an emotional time in coming to the desicion of what to do but once the desicion was made there was such a peace. And even though it has not been received well by some at the former Church and I fear loss of friendships because of it, or so it seems at this point, but God is able to heal and restore, as I have also seen this week! Anyway even though all that is going on I fees such a peace in knowing we are moving in the direction of getting closer and closer to God! WHAT can be wrong in that? Well, in the midst of all this once the decision was made I began having just TONS more energy, and my appetite has been very small, but not in a bad way, just in a satisfied way. Not sure this is making sense or not. But it is like alot of things to me I am wondering if they are a physical manifestation of a spiritual issue. So now I am taking that a step further to my weight issues. I physical manifestation of a spiritual problem! just maybe soo. I am under stress as we work hard to try to come up with ways to fundraise TONS of money we need to bring our son Jeremiah home from Taiwan! but its a good stress but stress none the less, so I need to turn to Jesus more and more and make sure my food choices are nothing but good and energy producing. Part of me is petrefied about how quickly we need the money, how I am having to wait on money to send in USCIS paperwork, how I need to get payment to the agency and HOW am I gonna do it. I AM NOT GONNA DO IT. I am gonna pray, I am gonna share the need and tell everyone else to pray and to share the need. When I watch the three SHORT video's of my amazing son Jeremiah in Taiwan my heart just melts for him. I know his cerebral palsy is severe and he needs me so much, he needs me to get him QUICK. He has already been waiting a year and so I know that I must move quickly. All that could lead a person to eat badly. I am coming here to yall that are followin me on this weight loss blog to ask you guys to pray for me to not fall into fast food cuz I am busy fundraising, to fall into eating bad because I am busy, stressed, etc. and Please do pray for Jeremiah! Pray for his mama to be a healthier thinner mama as this journey goes on :)

Here is the four of us on Easter. Next year Jeremiah will be in the picture!

mama and Noah playin! :)


Mel said...

oh bless your heart, tammy. i sure will keep you in my prayers about all the issues you mentioned in your recent post.jeremiah is such a sweetheart and one day soon you will be able to hold him and care for him. GOD will provide.
did SLC give him a haircut? he has so much hair!!!!! have you tried to apply for an adoption grant yet? hey, i found that on the webpage of heartsent agency:

scroll all the way to the bottom and maybe they can tell you more about it (the last paragraph about the life foundation grant)

did you mention you already had three videos of jeremiah??!!! that's awesome. are you planning on posting them as well (hint hint)?

god bless,

Empty Nester said...

Have you ever tried First Place, speaking of spirtitual vs. physical? My friend has a first place at her church on Sunday evenings if you are interested! Hugs and prayers to you!